ONE SMART COOKIE wrote:Crikey these jokes are getting worse
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Gorilla on your roof?
A man wakes up one morning to find a gorilla on his roof.
So he looks in the yellow pages and sure enough, there's an ad for "Gorilla Removers."
He calls the number, and the gorilla remover says he'll be over in 30 minutes.
The gorilla remover arrives, and gets out of his van. He's got a ladder, a baseball bat, a shotgun and a mean old pit bull.
"What are you going to do", the homeowner asks? "I'm going to put this ladder up against the roof, then I'm going to go up there and knock the gorilla off the roof with this baseball bat.
When the gorilla falls off, the pit bull is trained to grab his testicles and not let go.
The gorilla will then be subdued enough for me to put him in the cage in the back of the van."
He hands the shotgun to the homeowner. "What's the shotgun for?" asks the homeowner.
"If the gorilla knocks me off the roof, shoot the dog."
A woman takes her 16-year-old daughter to the doctor.
The doctor says, "Okay, Mrs. Jones, what's the problem?"
The mother says, "It's my daughter Darla. She keeps getting these
cravings, she's putting on weight, and is sick most mornings."
The doctor gives Darla a good examination, then turns to the mother
and says, "Well, I don't know how to tell you this, but your Darla
is pregnant - about 4 months, would be my guess."
The mother says, "Pregnant?! She can't be, she has never ever been
left alone with a man! Have you, Darla?"
Darla says, "No mother! I've never even kissed a man!"
The doctor walked over to the window and just stares out of it.
About five minutes pass and finally the mother says, "Is there
something wrong out there doctor?"
The doctor replies, "No, not really, it's just that the last time
anything like this happened, a star appeared in the east and three wise men came over the hill. I'll be damned if I'm going to miss it this time!"
Scott wrote:.... for a change!
samurai69 wrote:
what do you mean for a change....
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